"Damn she did you Dirty!!!!!"

Since I know some of y'all enjoy stories of foul foolishness and fucCery so here are three tales to feed your appetite.

Hit the Jump for the trouble tales......

#1

This shit was wild as fuck but I should have known better. Met this lil young bitch at the grocery store and we kicked it a few times. I wanted to fuck but she told me some bull shit about how she had just started the birth control shot and it had her cycle fucked up. Didn't think shit of it so i waited.

Couple weeks go by and she text me talking about she ready. Got a room since i didn't want to bring her to my crib. Got her naked and she Got some nigga name on her back big as fuck. Didn't pay it any mind... fast forward... we FUCKIN and as she riding me i squeeze her titties and the bitch was lactating. im like wtf are you pregnant? Come to find out the nigga name on her back was the dad of the two kids she lied about having and she hadn't really been on her cycle the bitch had just aborted the kid that would have been their third.

And she wanted to fuck so bad she Didn't even wait the full amount of time she was suppose to wait before having sex again. And she tells me all this while sitting on my dick.

Then she had the nigga watching their kids while he thought she was at work and she lived right around the corner from the hotel with her car parked out front. Bitch was just fucked up all the way around. I had to change my number to get her to leave me alone.

#2

i had a chick that used to give me shit that she bought for her husband, but he didn't wear (clothes, jewlery, etc),,, her hubby worked the graveyard shift,,, one night we were at her crib fucking & she said wanted to go out,,, i don't usually go to clubs with chicks i'm boning, so i said "i don't have anything to wear",,, she pulled one of his brand new outfits out & said "wear this",,, i was like damn,,,

after the club, she said "do you want that outfit",,, i said "no, i'm cool",,, she hung that muthafuka right back up in his closet,,, shit smelled like cigarette smoke & everything,,, i was like "damn that's scandalous",,, as if fucking her in his bed wasn't scandalous enough,,,

#3

I don't think I can top that story. This was my high school sweet heart, you know the first chick you spend a real amount of time in a relationship. Chocolate skin, high ass voice, ran track...you would've never expected this chick to be this grimy. We broke up during freshman year of college. Obviously because of the distance and ummmm...."exploring." I didn't know she got smutted out down there at Eastern Shore, but I found out later.

Anyway, we kind of rekindled right after we graduated. I had my first crib, so we kinda got it poppin again. One night she came over and kinda just stayed. She didn't have a job or anything, still livin with her cousin (I know red flags all over the place). But she was tryin to fuck like a jackrabbit. Finally, I got tired of her being there, you know single guy, newly independent....I wasn't tryin to wife up nobody. So I was like "I'm takin you home." Grabbed her bag, put her in the car and dropped her off at her cousins house.

Couple of weeks later I get a phone call. We made some small talk and she was like "I'm pregnant." The shit didn't sound right, it was just something wrong there. It was waaaaaaaaaaaay too soon for a chick to know she was pregnant. It wasn't even two weeks. So it turned ugly because I was like "What you gonna do?" Late night calls started. The "You ain't shit" calls from her girlfriend's started. At first I didn't even believe she was pregnant. So I drove over there with a huge ass bottle of water and some movies from Blockbuster. Told her to drink up. She did, we watched a movie and she peed and the little blue plus popped up. I was caught but something still didn't seem right.

A couple of weeks later, I finally gave up and was like fuck it and ready to knuckle down. So I went over to her cousin's crib and she wasn't home, but her cousin was...... So I was like, "Yeah, I'm about to hold it down and do right for this baby." Her cousin was an older chick like maybe 35-36, had her own crib, etc, etc. Stand up woman.

I'll never forget this shit. All of the truth came out, right there on the spot. Her cousin said I like you, I always liked you, so I'm about to tell you the truth. She sat me down and told me every thing this chick did from college till that point (that's why they were beefin). We talked for like two hours. She didn't clean up, help around the house, nothin. When she ordered Chinese food, she would leave the containers under the bed. She had all kinds of different dudes up in there and when she was in college she had been pregnant four times before. She was two months pregnant now. "It's not yours, she's trying to run game. Don't worry, I got this. Go home, get some sleep, you look like you need it."

She called the chick's aunt in Georgia (her mom). Auntie must've been the fist that rocks the cradle, because the chick called me a couple of weeks later and......apologized.