The following is the opening passage of today's entry from Punch Debt in the Face, a real point and witty financially themed blog:
I think it's quite funny how puzzled people become when I tell them I don't want to live with my girlfriend. I've been with Girl Ninja for three and a half years now, and apparently I didn't get the memo that I was required to move in with her after the first year. People look at me like I'm crazy, or making a big mistake.
You can read the rest of his blog here.
So this get's me to thinking about cohabitation and what beliefs I have, what beliefs others have, etc,etc.....
I do think that many people just assume that you "date" a person then after a while you just move in. I personally see moving in as a pre-engagement move. Like ok I know this is the one so let's get things moving. With the economy as it is, moving in with your significant other can happen a lot easier then a wedding depending on your financial standing and the type of wedding you want...but let em not get ahead of myself.
Many folk say that living together is the test of "can we spend our lives together" so that means if you don't work well as a live in couple that the relationship needs to end.Right? That seems easier that say then to do. Plus I personally would have no desire to deal with breaking up and having to move all in the same time.
I'm old school but I don't have an issue with living together before marriage.I'm just going to be as sure as possible about who I make such a move with.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Mi Casa es su casa
Posted by NightFall914 at 9:13 AM
Labels: life lessons, Marriage, Relationships, THOUGHTS
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6 comments:
mini blog time!!
I like my own space. I can be obnoxious to live with.
Decor: I think guys would have major issues with a bright pink couch, zebra printed cooking utensils, and gay porn coffee table books.
Sleep: I stay up all night and I wake up at 6am, bright eyed and bushy tailed. I'm loud and I don't like people sleeping around me. When I do sleep, I talk, scream, toss/turn, bite and text.
Pets: I have cats and if my apartment allowed more pets, I'd have a freakin zoo in my house. Most people have issues with animals. Mine roam the house like they own the place. They even shower with me and we share bottled water.
I don't believe in wearing clothes in my apartment. I drink out of the container. I sing showtunes at the top of my lungs at 3am using a hair brush as my microphone while playing bongos.
For all of these reasons, I could never have a room mate no matter how much money it saved me. I have 5 siblings so when I got my own place, I knew I'd never live with people ever again. I'd be completely miserable and I KNOW there isn't a human being alive who would tolerate that. I don't understand why flawed people who are set in their ways co-habitate. There's always gonna be one person more dominant than the other. You will BOTH suffer and don't even get me started on the sexual tension.
I have never had a roommate. The only two people I have lived with besides my parents is my ex husband and my son's father. And even then, with me being an only child and used to having my space, it was quite an adjustment.
I think more folk live together right now for economics. It's cheaper for couples to cohabitate than it is to pay rent times two. But I know that is not for me. Especially with me having two kids. WTF would I look like living with someone?
*Le-sigh*
Okay, get outta my head, I have been attempting to blog about this for the past month, had a picture saved on my computer and everything but couldn't figure out how I wanted to word it. Maybe I'll do that now
Ive been there done that with cohabiting and it was quite the learning experience. I would like to hold off until engagenment or marriage next time around.
Because to be quite honest if I move in its because I have put down on a house with this person (long-term commitment) and you dont just buy a house with your current pumpington mcsnuggles.
A year is a bit short for me..but to each his own.
I believe you have to know if you can live with someone before you get to the point of marriage, maybe even engagement. Do I think people need to be in a rush to move in together? Hell no.
A year is too fast for me. I was with someone for two years, and we got into an argument because I told him I didn't want to co-habitate with him. Time and the pace is up to the parties in the relationship, but that is a huge step towards marriage. As long as both are ready and willing why not?
Love the feedback. Thanks ladies.
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