Monday, July 12, 2010

That's a lot to lose.......

What is it that makes a person decide to move in with or invite their partner to move in with them? I ask this not even considering marriage because that is pretty self explanatory. But what makes younger folk shack up? To date I can say I've never been moved to want to take that step seriously. Could I see it? Well, yeah in the best periods of a relationship I can see many things but once reality settles back in I admit to myself that I need my space. I want my space and the idea of waking up to some one every morning is more major a lifestyle change than I could handle at the moment. I imagine disagreements where I need space and having to leave the crib for air because hey we both live here now.

The ability to have 100% control of a space.....your space is such an important part of me right now. I've heard other speak on co-habitation and it's so interesting to me. I guess the emotions are such that in my head I connect living with a female directly into wanting marriage. It goes hand in hand.

I've felt it before during the young puppy love of my long distance relationship some 9-10 years ago so I know the sway that love has on things.

I dont know its just a hell of a step and I'm always curious at those that have no problem just giving up their space just like that for their "other half". Maybe you do have to see it that understand it.


Frankie said...

I like having my space. I like being the king AND queen of the castle. I'm ALWAYS channeling my inner Martin by tellin folks to get da steppin if they have a problem with me in MY apartment. I live in a loft apartment with no doors so there's only 1 tv. I like watching what I wanna watch. I like walking around naked. I like drinking out the the carton. I like my toilet seat down. I like a pube free bathroom. I like having obnoxiously loud phone conversations without censoring myself. I like every-man-for-himself style meals vs "honey, what do you have a taste for tonight?" situations. Damn just cuz we live together, we gotta eat the same shit? I want sushi and ice cream for breakfast sometimes!

Don't get me wrong, co-habitation has it's positives too like getting laid whenever you want, having someone cook for you, a protector against the boogeyman, someone to take out the trash, and best of all HALF ON THE BILLS!!!

Nik said...

Naw, I don't want no part of shacking up with anybody. No one should have to leave their space to get some "space". I also view living together as a result of being engaged with a DEFINITE wedding date!

I agree with you and all your points.

Goddess Intellect said...

Overnights are stressful enough because I have to cook and be attentive,and make sure the apartment is spic and span, extra linens towels etc --> stuff I neglect when I'm by myself.
HOWEVER, I did co-habit for a few years with an ex. I enjoyed the bed warming, sharing of chores and not having as many responsibilites but as a woman if you're doing your domestic thing right, men (not ALL men, just frm oberservation w my experience and others) tend to get very comfortable, especially if they had a mother who would wait hand on foot for them.
I'd like to say that I am going to wait until marriage, but who knows. I'm open to engagement and shacking up BUT then I would miss out on home gift registry at my wedding and that would be no bueno. I want fine china and a sick ass kitchen aid appliances.
One of my couple friends have purchased a property together and rent it out to tenants, thats some baller shit that I would consider,especially on a resale... but as of this moment I'm cool w sharing an apartment w my doggy

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