Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Not How It Used To Be.....

How do we come to define friendships? It seems to be a combo of what is shown to us, what we see from those around us and what we ourselves come to define it as. Regardless of what factor effected us most its an unavoidable fact that these relationships will change in time. What was the norm will become the rare exception. Over the past few years I've seen this happening and I've honestly tried to fight it in many cases. Unfortunately its a fight that is not in me to actually win. Friends grow apart. This happens due to various levels of life separation. People move away, people get married, start families, priorities change, interests change, time just doesn't allow it....or you're value to them just isn't what it used to be. No real crime in that, it's just life. People, reasons, seasons blah, blah, blah.....I know.

I've reached out to some folk who were fixtures in life who's "disappearances" didn't make sense to me. The effort needed in these cases to meet the status quo really wasn't much of anything. Which made that lack of movement that much hurtful. Yet it was many of these situations that taught that sometimes its not a physical tangible thing that's stopping people, its their mind set that no longer includes you. And that's often on a subconscious level. By subconscious I mean that if you speak to them they will never say a bad thing about you. They may deflect the reason for the distance, laugh it off and swear that it wont continue. Then the second you walk away it continues.

In the end I've come to accept that some connections will never be what they were for whatever the reason. Yeah should we link up again in the future it'll be all love but the hope on my end for the former level of consistency is fizzled out. I'm where I am and for some where I am is unreachable soil. 914 aka Antarctica aka the North Eastern Triangle...I don't know. It is what it is. I went through a period of really being upset about this. Now not so much. I do work well in quiet and solitude. And life has provided quite a batch of new friends and supporters, so let whatever hampers others from being mobile or reaching out be on them.

The story continues full speed ahead with no regrets. Those who elect to join the ride are welcome. If friendship has been earned along the way it will always be there even if in the most basic of forms.


Kream said...

This is the honest truth. Only a few things in life stay consistent. I wish it was all the things we wanted to. Those of us who love, value & appreciate you will continue to do so. You are a blessing.

DollFace said...

Interesting....real interesting post.

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