Keeping It Low Key

Not really in the Hump Day Mood.

It's been the week of misinterpreted action so I'ma just keep it easy today on the Blvd. 

Well Timed......

Maybe I'll go find a angry Heat fan and but them a drink?

LOL!

I Just Need Simplicity

As little as I ask for...As little as I really need...Life just has to be complicated....Not surprised at this but still it's taxing at times.

...but today at least gave me a sparkle from the tunnels end.

I'll be thankful and embrace that tonight.....

Motivation through fear.....

While growing, maturing and experiencing life....I can still see hints of old issues I have from my youth like the fear of replacement......I think it will always be a part of me to some degree...

...Gotta take my own advice.....

I'm always one to say no one controls your mood but you. It's on you how you react to the world's moves....You can accept it and move on or dwell in disappoinment.

Alright Jason, it's your move....

...."really?"......

My reaction to the day I've had......

Project BLU 365

Feb. was a crazy month with all the damn snow storms but I stick to the script and take my daily images. I was just being lazy in posting them. So here is the month of Feb in its near entirety.(missed like 2 days handling this weather)

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Happy Birthday to Me

Blessed and Thankful

Single Thought

We all know when you stare long enough into the abyss the abyss stares back at you......The difference between you and me is that you blinked.

Happy Birthday to me.....

I do what I want........

Ok so here's my mind set right now.6 days to my bday and to combat the bullshit that's been poppin up, I'm now officially in birthday celebration mode.6 days of light hearted pre bday enjoyment, giving thanks for another year next Thursday and then another 12 days of celebration. It'll be fun and also very informative. The guy that jumps out the window for everyone else will be a lil selfish a lil self centered you know. The incorrect assumptions, high and mighty attitudes and indirect "blahzay" vibes and the "its all about me" personalities can be kept to y'all selves. It's my time of the year and I plan to recharge and re-energize.All of which will culminate in Austin, TX.

The next 2 1/2 weeks will contain good company, good food, good drink, quality music, love and affection.If you're not willing to add to that simplistic equation then I hope you stay silent.

Yeah I can already feel the vibes.

Smh @ hump day.....

***NOT WORK SAFE***
Half of me wants this and the other wants sum of this.......
(Yeah I could be more subtle but I dont wanna be..lol)


Oh Well......

Ok lets Chat........

My name is Jason....but I go by a healthy list of nicCnames, aliases, aka's, etc....

When I turned 18 I got my first tattoo "Death Before Dishonor around a samurai sword.8 months later I got a guardian angel on my other arm. I'm not the first to have either one but at the time and still today they hold deep meaning for me. They represent what I believe, what I do and who I am. These feelings have various roots. At the heart of it is my family structure. I grew up in a 2 family house that was the "welcome mat to the hood". 9 Brook St which has been renamed Malcolm X Blvd. Anyway, I lived with both parents, a younger brother 2 aunts and a female cousin. That equals 4 older women raising me while my dad worked. Now my dad was and still is the central figure/example to me as he sufficiently provided for us all. But in this entry lets focus on the females effect on me. I had strong positive females around me and that through the years instilled a very protective nature in me towards females in general and an extremely protective nature to those that were close to me.

Fast forward to high school because until then my interaction with girls with limited. I was very Steve Urkelish so you can only imagine. Anyway, in my mind females were to be treated a particular and respected as such, so I was the old school gentleman helping and holding doors, blah, blah, blah. This was met with bewilderment and skepticism from females who thought "He must want something" I really didn't. It was just who I was. There reached a point where I started to doubt the logic that told me that this is how I should have been operating. But as fate would have it I got the ultimate reassurance from to females I had become very close with.They were twins, so I'll refer to them collectively as that. These twins arrived late in the junior school yr and took the whole place by storm.2 short, cute big booty(yet nicely proportioned) PR girls. They broke necCs throughout the whole place. Now yeah I thought they were cute but I wasn't pushing up on them.I was still a V trooper and not really concerned with sex. Anyway, we just ended all being cool. I went over their place to help with school work, being the high student I was,lol. I got cool with their younger cousins and to me it was just being a good friend.

I was on the basketball team and this is where I earned another aspect of my personality, a serious dislike for disrespectful guys. We're all in the locCer room and talk turns to females. I would get the "hey Zig(basketball niccname) whats good with you and the Twins?...I'd reply "Nothing.We're just cool" which would get its jeers but no one questioned it. I guess the idea of me "getting with" the 2 new hot girls wasn't something they felt could happen. Well then one of the team captains said. "Please **name withheld** is all on my shit.I'ma fucC her watch." Now I knew it wasn't on me to cocC blocC cuz I knew **name withheld** actually liked him but the slicC talk just never has sat well with me.

Before we all graduated these twins confined something very deep to me. The fact that prior to the establishment of our friendship that they were actually suicidal and that my showing them caring and compassion without any personal desires helped them get through the tough transition.They were the first people a social setting to tell me they loved me and that I was there guardian angel. So that's where it came from.

That Guardian position has maintained and evolved over the years. I now have females friends bigger issues, domestic issues, single parenting issues. I'm really earning my guardian title and while its difficult at times. I wear it proudly because its what I was built for. Buuuuut, its made me a little weird to some things. Its 2009 and lets be realistic I don't know or seriously doubt that any of my female friends are V troopers but I get my protective gut gets a funny feeling when my lady friends talk about sex. Now its not because I think their not having but rather.....I know so much about them and the guys they have dealt with that my guardian gear shoots into over drive and I feel that these bitch ass, fronting ass, lame ass clowns are worthy to be interacting with my folk like that. Yeah it's extreme I know but its what I am.

I love my people to degree that I really can't describe. There are billions of people walking this earth so excuse me if I'm a little protective of the handful that mean something to me. If there were armies of guys like me then it wouldn't matter.But then you have men like the ones that create THESE stories, someone has to be there to even the playing field.